


my lonely days are through

by woodchoc_magnum



Series: love will find a way [6]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Domestic, Eddie Diaz Loves Evan "Buck" Buckley, Eddie Diaz Week 2020 (9-1-1 TV), Established Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz, Evan "Buck" Buckley Loves Eddie Diaz, Firehouse 118 as Family (9-1-1 TV), Found Family, M/M, Soft Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-14
Updated: 2020-11-14
Packaged: 2021-03-10 01:42:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27556261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woodchoc_magnum/pseuds/woodchoc_magnum
Summary: Day 6: “I chose this family for a reason” + domesticIn which Buck throws Eddie a birthday party, and his found family rallies around him.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: love will find a way [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2005498
Comments: 43
Kudos: 294





	my lonely days are through

**Author's Note:**

> If you haven't read [Catch Me When I Fall](https://archiveofourown.org/works/27540889), go and do that first and then come back to this one. :)

It was all Buck's idea and therefore, it was all Buck's fault.

He wanted to throw Eddie a birthday party. Eddie said no, multiple times.

Buck pleaded his case – Eddie had been out of action for almost six months, and now that he'd recovered, and he was back at work, that meant he could conceivably drink and dance at a birthday party.

Eddie said no.

Buck tried again – they could have the party at Eddie's house, if he preferred, and Buck would handle everything, and all Eddie had to do was turn up.

Eddie said no.

The next idea was for a party at the station, but Eddie said no, _again_ , and they had a small, whispered argument about it in the bedroom, which quickly turned into furious kissing until Christopher began to shout at them from the hallway that dinner was burning.

Finally, about three weeks out from the big day, Buck lowered Eddie's defences with an earth-shattering orgasm, and then, when he was in a weakened state and unable to properly stand his ground, he tried again. "I just want you to have a big party," Buck had murmured in his ear, pressing tiny kisses along his jawline. "I just want everyone you love to be able to celebrate you. It's been such a hard year, Eds… let me give you a nice party."

"No."

"Why not?" There was an edge of whining to Buck's voice, but Eddie mostly ignored it, trying to find his lips for a kiss. "Let me give you a party."

He sighed. "I don't want it to be a big deal. You gonna propose or something?"

Buck's lips were on his collarbone. "No," he murmured, sliding his tongue along the prominent ridge. "Just want to do something nice for you."

"You've been doing nice things for me all day," Eddie replied, pushing his fingers through Buck's hair. "Kiss me."

"Mmm, in a sec." Buck's head dipped lower, his tongue swirling around Eddie's nipple. Eddie's breathing quickened, and he tightened his grip on Buck's hair.

If Buck kept this up, he'd be ready for round two again, and he tugged Buck's hair until he lifted his head again. "Kiss me," Eddie insisted, and finally Buck obliged, bracing himself on his hands and leaning over Eddie for a hungry kiss.

That was it; that was what he wanted, and he eagerly responded, cupping the back of Buck's neck. Buck had him eating out of the palm of his hand when he pulled away and said softly, "A small party here, with just the 118 and Carla. Just family."

Figuring that was the lesser of all the evils, Eddie nodded in agreement, and flipped Buck onto his back.

~

He felt awkward about it; that was the thing. He'd nearly died, and his parents had effectively disowned him, and he was well aware that he'd been the topic of conversation for months and that his friends had gone out of their way to be there for him; to help him when he needed it… he felt like he'd almost taken too much of their kindness. He hated for them to have to go out of their way for him _again_. He could live without a birthday party – he had Christopher and Buck; he didn't really need anything else.

But Buck had wanted to do this for him, and Bobby had suggested that it wasn't because Buck had any ulterior motives – it was more likely that Buck, the loveable golden retriever that he was, was simply _in love_ and wanted to have a party for his boyfriend.

Eddie felt guilty after that conversation, and then stole Buck away from Hen and Chimney in order to apologise to him with kisses in the bunk room. "I just don't like a fuss," he murmured, running his hands up and down Buck's arms. "You know me."

"I know," Buck said, smiling warmly at him. "Just trust me, okay? I have it all planned out."

"Nothing too wild."

"No strippers; I promise."

~

Eddie was effectively left out of the planning process, and on the day itself, Buck sent him over to his Abuela's with Christopher to have lunch with her. They were seated at the table together, passing around food, when his Abuela said, "I've never seen you happier, you know."

Eddie raised his eyebrows at her, amused. "After the year from hell?" he asked wryly. He could complain about rehab and the endless doctor's visits and the fact that after everything, his hip still ached at night, and the days of frantic, energetic sex with Buck were currently on hold – but he held his tongue, sure that everyone was sick of him moaning and complaining about it by now.

"Not that," she replied, admonishing him with a look. "With Buck. Despite everything, with Buck."

He shrugged, embarrassed. "I don't know."

"I was very worried about you, but I don't worry so much anymore. You and Buck have a happy little family together, right, Christopher?" she asked, touching him under his chin.

Christopher gave Eddie a greasy grin. "Yeah, we do."

Eddie nodded, suddenly on the verge of tears. "I'm sorry to have sprung it on you at the hospital."

"Oh, we knew," she replied, waving her hand dismissively. "He's the only person you've spoken about in years; the only person you introduced us to. He's your closest friend and confidant and he follows you around like a puppy. It's sweet. I think it's very sweet."

"Buck's a puppy," Christopher said with a giggle.

"You're the puppy," Eddie teased him, reaching out to boop his nose, and then turned back to his Abuela. "Thank you. I'm sorry… that Mom and Dad aren't… I'm sorry that I caused this."

"You didn't cause anything; _they did_ ," she replied, shaking her head. "This is not your fault. You are who you are. They need to accept it."

That was what everyone had been telling him all along, but it was a relief to hear it from his grandmother. He leaned in to kiss her on the cheek gratefully, and she clutched his hand and smiled at him tenderly.

~

When Eddie and Christopher arrived home, multiple cars were parked out the front. "We're late," Christopher said, as Eddie helped him out of the car.

"Buck said to come home at six." He checked his watch. "We're actually early. Come on."

The front door opened as they were walking up the path, and Buck stepped out to greet them. "We're all in the backyard," he said, leaning in to kiss Eddie. "Did you have a nice lunch?"

"Yeah, it was good," Eddie replied, holding Christopher's hand as he climbed the steps. "You haven't gone to much trouble, have you?"

"Nope." Buck followed them inside, flipping the lock on the front door, and pulled him in for another kiss. "Come on. We're about to fire up the grill."

Milling around in the backyard were all of his friends – Bobby, Chimney and Michael were arguing at the grill; Karen and Athena were whispering about something in the corner together, Maddie had baby Rose in her lap, sitting with Hen and May at the table, and Albert and the kids were tearing around the backyard together.

"He's here!" Buck announced, and a chorus of, 'Happy Birthday!' rang out through the yard.

Eddie waved to everyone, embarrassed, helping Christopher down onto the grass. "Thanks, guys."

"Come and sit," Hen said, pulling out a chair for him. "Buck said you're not to do any work."

Eddie wasn't going to protest about that, and he took a seat beside Hen. Christopher lingered near him as Buck went to check on the progress at the grill, and Eddie said to him, "Bud, why don't you go play with the others?"

Christopher shook his head. He'd been extra clingy ever since the accident, so Eddie helped him up onto his lap. Christopher hooked an arm around his shoulders and leaned back into his arms.

"Getting a bit big for this," Eddie murmured to him, but Christopher just shook his head.

"You're never too big for a cuddle from Dad," Maddie replied, smiling warmly at him. "Have you had a good birthday so far?"

"Yeah, I'm not really sure why Buck's gone to all this effort, but that's okay."

Hen leaned in and said, "I'm pretty sure it's because he's head over heels in love with you. And you've had a tough year."

He nodded, suddenly inexplicably sad again. In a way, it had been one of the best years, in that he was finally living openly, he was in love, Christopher was happy… but the good times were undercut by everything else. He was trying to move on with his life, but he sometimes wrestled with the fact that his happiness had come at the cost of his parents, and while he understood that it was their problem and not his, it still hurt.

When Maddie and May stood up from the table and went to chat with Athena and Karen, Michael joined them, taking a seat across from Eddie. The conversation drifted from Michael's new boyfriend to the crazy guy who poured purple paint on Hen at a call (apparently he'd thought she was a genie), but when Buck appeared and coerced Christopher to come and help him at the barbeque, Hen took the opportunity while Eddie was alone to lean in and ask quietly, "How are you doing, Eddie?"

He shrugged and flashed a smile. "I'm okay."

"Bobby tells me your parents are still not speaking to you," Michael said gently. "I'm sorry about that."

"Yeah, I mean… I tried to reach out, but… my father told my sister to tell me not to bother. I knew this would happen, you know… it's why I tried to deny it for so long." He lifted his shoulders again, glancing over at Buck, who was laughing with Bobby and Chimney.

"I only met your parents that one time but from everything you've said, you're probably better off," Hen said gently. "But I know how much it hurts."

He let out a light chuckle. "You know the weird thing? Not having to speak to them is honestly like a weight off my shoulders. I used to dread getting their phone calls. It would always be non-stop criticising, but now… they never call. And I'm happier for it."

"Well, we certainly remember how awful they were that day at the hospital," Michael said, unimpressed. "You really slept through that? The nurses were about to call the police."

"I didn't hear a thing. Buck barricaded the door." Eddie shifted in his seat, glancing over at Buck again. "The thing is, it's not so much about me. I feel like they wrote me off when I was a teenager; that I wasn't going to do anything they wanted me to do. Ever since Christopher was born, it's only been about him – and that's fine, but… now they've effectively cut us both out of their lives, and he's confused by it, and I don't know what to say. He loves Buck, and I know he's happy now that Buck and I are together, but… I know he overheard things, and I know… he's going to have a lot of questions. And I feel selfish."

Hen took his hand, but it was Michael who leaned forward and said, "Listen to me, Eddie – you are entitled to your own happiness. I know I'm not the first one to say this to you, but it's true. I was in a similar situation and I still wrestle with it, but ultimately, I know I had to come out, and blow up my whole life, in order to rebuild things again. I was no good as a husband or a father when I was miserable all the time."

Eddie swallowed hard. "I don't think I was either."

"You don't need to feel guilty about taking your parents away from Christopher," Hen said gently. "They did that. Not you. This is their choice, and you are not responsible for their choices. You'll always have us, Eddie. We're your family as well."

He smiled at her warmly. "Yeah, you are," he replied, reaching out to take her hand. "Thanks for understanding. Buck tries; I just… he doesn't really get it."

"Because he doesn't have a relationship with his parents, so he can never really understand," Hen replied. "You come from different backgrounds, and that's okay. The thing with Buck is that you and Christopher will always be first priority for him, and even if he doesn't understand, that doesn't mean he won't _try_."

"Yeah, you're right," he murmured, glancing at Buck again, who met his eyes at the same moment. "I'm lucky to have him."

"I think he thinks he's lucky to have you and Christopher," Michael pointed out, and at that he smiled, _genuinely_ – Buck told him every single day how happy he was; how much he loved them, how he'd do anything for them… Buck loved with his whole self, every single fibre of his being. And Eddie loved him for that.

~

It was after the party, when Christopher was in bed and Buck and Eddie were putting away the last of the dishes, that Eddie tugged Buck in for a hug, swaying back and forth with him in the kitchen. Buck rubbed a hand up and down his back, slowly but surely, his face tucked against Eddie's neck.

"You okay?" Buck murmured. "You had a good time?"

He nodded. It was an easy, relaxed night – no drama, no stress. Everyone enjoying each other's company and having a good time – this big, amazing extended family he'd found for himself, after years of feeling lost and alone.

Eddie pulled away from Buck, cupping his face. "I love you," he said, and Buck's eyes lit up, as they always did whenever Eddie told him he loved him. "I know I haven't always been the easiest to be around this year. I know I've been upset and angry a lot, and I know… it hasn't been easy. But I love you, Buck. Thank you for being here for us."

"I had nowhere else to be," Buck replied with an impish grin.

Eddie kissed him quickly and then pulled away, resting both hands on his shoulders. "It's been hard, you know? But I chose this family for a reason. I chose this family because it means happiness for Christopher and for me. It means that I'm not feeling guilty all the time; it means that Christopher will grow up with two parents who love each other, and he deserves that. I wish my parents were different, but that's on them. I'm okay," he said, his voice lifting with hope. "I'm okay. I'm really okay."

"God, I'm glad to hear that," Buck breathed. "I've been worried."

"I know, but… I'm starting to feel good again," he said. "And it's all thanks to you. I love you."

"I love you too," Buck replied fervently. "I adore you."

Eddie leaned in to kiss him sweetly, as the entirety of their relationship flashed through his mind in quick succession – their first awkward meeting to the moment he realised he wanted Buck on his team permanently, to the countless hours spent together at work and home, to the trips to the park, the zoo and the beach, to realising he might have feelings for the guy and their first tentative, terrifying kiss before he finally shattered that wall he'd built around himself as protection, to the car accident and beyond – everything, all of it, every single second, made him realise how certain he was about the future.

He pulled away, cupped Buck's face with both hands, and whispered, "Marry me?"

Buck lit up with a huge smile, and nodded vigorously. " _Yes._ "

~

They married on a Friday at the courthouse in downtown LA, in ninety degree heat, with their chosen family around them. They had the reception at Bobby and Athena's, where they sang and danced into the early hours of the morning. Eddie awoke the morning after to find his husband asleep beside him, still in his dress shirt and pants, and to Christopher making his way into the bedroom to wake them up for pancakes.

Eddie had finally found his happiness.

~the end~

**Author's Note:**

> This is the end of the main story, but I'll be posting Day 7 tomorrow, which is a standalone story. :)
> 
> Thank you to Kat ([cinematicnomad](https://cinematicnomad.tumblr.com/) on Tumblr) for all your help!
> 
> The title is from [I've Been Waiting for You - Abba](https://youtu.be/gJRxEiAivEA)
> 
> Talk to me @ Tumblr: [woodchoc-magnum](https://woodchoc-magnum.tumblr.com/)


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